My past two days have been spent in the role as a substitute teacher in one of our local high school Spanish classes. The job popped up at just the right time. Calvin had just been dealt another week with fewer hours at work and we were beginning to pick and choose which bills we were going to pay and which ones could wait until the next pay-check. I asked the Lord to provide for us financially and not even two hours later I received a phone call from the secretary at the high school asking if I'd like to sub! I have never received a subbing phone-call before, ever! I don't even remember filling out any paperwork to do it! But that's just God for you. He's always providing at exactly the right time!
I thought you might enjoy some of the interesting dialogues I had with the students (or overheard) in my time as a sub...
After one sophomore boy kept leaving his seat and stirring up the class, I told him to pretend his rear was glued to his seat:
Sophomore boy: (getting up out of his seat, he says to me...) It's stretchy glue! :)
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One freshman boy (apparently) couldn't see my name on the board and got my attention by saying:
"Mrs. ... Substitute" :)
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On Monday, a female student came to visit me at lunch with two of her friends. She had heard me speak at the Lifeline Pregnancy Banquet and bought one of my books:
Female Student #1: I am only half way through your book. It's so good, but so sad...
Female Student #2: You wrote a book!?!
Me: Yep, about my baby...
Female Student #2: You have a baby!!?!!
Me: (In my mind: Why thank you, thank you very much (with an Elvis flare)... for the extreme self-esteem boost!) :)
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Sophomore boy said to me on Monday: How old are you? Like 22?
Me: (I gave him a smirk, like: "are you kidding me?")
Next day, a senior girl asks: I heard you have two kids, is that true?
Me: yes
Same Sophomore boy as the day before: "How long have you been married?"
Me: 8 years in May...I got married when I was 19
Sophomore boy: What!?!? Then how are you 22!!?! :)
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Sophomore boy: Yeah, I am going to do some commercial Salmon fishing in Alaska this summer
Me: Wow, you're gonna make bank!
Sophomore boy #2: (in a huge laugh and surprise look) Whoa! She just said make bank!
Sophomore boy to me: Wow, you're pretty hip
Me: Why? Is make bank something only young people say?
Sophomore boy: Yeah! If our teacher was here, she would've called it greenbacks or something! :)
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Day 1:
Sophomore boy: Can I go to the bathroom? I gotta take a ______________. (use your imagination...not the bad word though)
Me: (knowing this kid was just trying to get out of class, but I had just let two other kids go...) Do it in under three minutes.
Sophomore boy: Three minutes!!?! I'm usually gone for half an hour!
Senior girl: It's true Mrs. Wilkins, he's always gone for half of class
Me: You have three minutes.
6 minutes later...
Sophomore boy returns: Was I fast?
Me: No, you were late.
Sophomore boy: That was the fastest ever!
Me: Next time, go before class.
Day 2:
Sophomore boy enters class: Hi Mrs Wilkins, I went ____________ before class today.
Me: Good.
Half way through class:
Sophomore boy: Can I go to the bathroom?
Me: Number 1 or Number 2?
Sophomore boy: Not number 1.
Me: Then, no.
Sophomore boy: What!?
Me: You already went. You said so yourself. :)
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All in all, my two days as a sub were quite amusing. I learned that the teenage mutant ninja turtles is a favorite past-time cartoon of many of the high school boys, dating is a complex subject (one girl says that if her boyfriend would have asked her out sooner she wouldn't have liked it, but if he would have waited she would've been mad), and that, in most cases, boys make way more noise than girls.
I had a lot of fun and am so thankful for the gift of work this week! Thank you, Lord, for the entertainment and the financial provision.
Until next time...
I thought you might enjoy some of the interesting dialogues I had with the students (or overheard) in my time as a sub...
After one sophomore boy kept leaving his seat and stirring up the class, I told him to pretend his rear was glued to his seat:
Sophomore boy: (getting up out of his seat, he says to me...) It's stretchy glue! :)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
One freshman boy (apparently) couldn't see my name on the board and got my attention by saying:
"Mrs. ... Substitute" :)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
On Monday, a female student came to visit me at lunch with two of her friends. She had heard me speak at the Lifeline Pregnancy Banquet and bought one of my books:
Female Student #1: I am only half way through your book. It's so good, but so sad...
Female Student #2: You wrote a book!?!
Me: Yep, about my baby...
Female Student #2: You have a baby!!?!!
Me: (In my mind: Why thank you, thank you very much (with an Elvis flare)... for the extreme self-esteem boost!) :)
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sophomore boy said to me on Monday: How old are you? Like 22?
Me: (I gave him a smirk, like: "are you kidding me?")
Next day, a senior girl asks: I heard you have two kids, is that true?
Me: yes
Same Sophomore boy as the day before: "How long have you been married?"
Me: 8 years in May...I got married when I was 19
Sophomore boy: What!?!? Then how are you 22!!?! :)
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sophomore boy: Yeah, I am going to do some commercial Salmon fishing in Alaska this summer
Me: Wow, you're gonna make bank!
Sophomore boy #2: (in a huge laugh and surprise look) Whoa! She just said make bank!
Sophomore boy to me: Wow, you're pretty hip
Me: Why? Is make bank something only young people say?
Sophomore boy: Yeah! If our teacher was here, she would've called it greenbacks or something! :)
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Day 1:
Sophomore boy: Can I go to the bathroom? I gotta take a ______________. (use your imagination...not the bad word though)
Me: (knowing this kid was just trying to get out of class, but I had just let two other kids go...) Do it in under three minutes.
Sophomore boy: Three minutes!!?! I'm usually gone for half an hour!
Senior girl: It's true Mrs. Wilkins, he's always gone for half of class
Me: You have three minutes.
6 minutes later...
Sophomore boy returns: Was I fast?
Me: No, you were late.
Sophomore boy: That was the fastest ever!
Me: Next time, go before class.
Day 2:
Sophomore boy enters class: Hi Mrs Wilkins, I went ____________ before class today.
Me: Good.
Half way through class:
Sophomore boy: Can I go to the bathroom?
Me: Number 1 or Number 2?
Sophomore boy: Not number 1.
Me: Then, no.
Sophomore boy: What!?
Me: You already went. You said so yourself. :)
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
All in all, my two days as a sub were quite amusing. I learned that the teenage mutant ninja turtles is a favorite past-time cartoon of many of the high school boys, dating is a complex subject (one girl says that if her boyfriend would have asked her out sooner she wouldn't have liked it, but if he would have waited she would've been mad), and that, in most cases, boys make way more noise than girls.
I had a lot of fun and am so thankful for the gift of work this week! Thank you, Lord, for the entertainment and the financial provision.
Until next time...
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